The Dev and I have been having issues lately.
Not with each other luckily but with the struggle together against inertia. The painful horrible repetitive nature of doing the same thing day in and day out.
Of working all week just to get to the weekend, and then doing it all again just to rush through another week or month or year of life with nothing to show for it. The pressure of the passing of time, of getting older every day and being at the same place we were a year ago for so many things. We are both getting extraordinarily rammy and frustrated at the lack of .. achievement? movement? success? with things we are trying to ‘make happen’.
The house we still haven’t bought – and are now priced out of the market. The baby-making that just isn’t making a baby. The daily drone of doing things that don’t inspire our minds or feed our souls. And if one more person says ‘it will just happen when you stop looking/trying/thinking about it’ can just go and f-off because when you want something and have been working towards or for it for so long there is no forgetting about it. It is just there. At the forefront, or the background or peripherals, but perpetually there.
We had our ‘when you least expect it’ moment when we found each other. I don’t know if we will get another.
And so we talk about it and try to figure out what on earth to do. And cry.